Eleven.

Dear Banks,

Well, it's official. You are officially a "tween" (or a "quarantween," as is oh so appropriate for 2020). How we got here so quickly, I just don't know. 

I remember SO vividly, shortly after I became a stay-at-home momma, just after we had moved to our sweet, new hometown, lying on the floor in our playroom, with your baby sister crawling around the room while you and I played game after game after game. I could hear the clock on the wall ticking evvvvvvery singllllllle seconnnnnnd, oh so slowly. It was like time was inching by at a snail's pace. And then, I blinked, and here we are. 

You are nowhere to be found as I write this: you are out riding your bike all over the neighborhood with your best friends, which is where you can be found on any given afternoon that you don't have a sports practice. You LOVE spending time with your friends. And I LOVE that for you. But also, honestly: I miss you! It's hard as a momma, to let your baby develop into his own self: someone with his own interests and preferences. Someone whose family:friend time ratio ever so slowly transforms, so that your friends now seem to see you more than I do. It makes me so happy to know you are so happy. And it also makes me so happy when you walk back in those doors each day, even if for shorter stints as you get older. 

One of the things that makes me happiest is watching you play sports. Because YOU are just so happy, so dialed in, so at home, on a field. You have been for as long as I can remember. You always give it your all, every time; you take criticism and then work hard to improve; and, what I am proudest of: you cheer your teammates on and celebrate their accomplishments as much as your own.

The older you get, the more I see how similar we are: crusaders for justice who want things to be fair; obsessors of allllll the things, big and small; people who are happiest being outside and being active; loyalists who love fiercely and endlessly. 

And yet. You are changing. Every day, you are discovering more and more of who you are. And I am discovering more and more of you I am as a momma: the art of balancing teaching you and letting you learn on your own. And I am learning alongside you, buddy. Because just as you are 11 years old today, I am 11 years old at being a momma. What a gift it is to be yours. 

For the rest of my life, I will be grateful that I get to be YOUR momma. And I will be grateful that YOU were my first born. I wouldn't want it any other way. Because every new milestone, every new lesson, every new year: we grow, together. 

Happy 11th Birthday, Banks Alexander. You have always been, and will always be, my sunshine. I love you more than you could possibly know. Here's to the tween year, honey. I can't wait to watch you shine!

With All My Heart, 

Momma