Four.

Dear Bella,

HAPPY 4TH BIRTHDAY, BABY GIRL!!! I guess I shouldn't be calling you "baby" anymore, seeing as how you're a big, bad 4-year-old, but sweet girl, you will always be my baby. And maybe God knew it would be hard for me to see my little ones grow up, so He's given me my last child with an extra season of babyhood to help soften the blow. <3 But Bellaboo, you have come SO far since that fateful day we finally got to meet the missing piece of our heart, who was waiting for her family to come to her in China. While this last year has certainly had it's share of highs and lows, you have just blossomed the last month or so, and it brings me such joy and happiness to see you overcome so much.

The thing is Bels, you have had to work harder than any young one ever should, just to do things that come naturally and easily to other kiddos your age. Almost everything requires extra effort on your part. But honey, you persevere and you (usually) do it with a smile on your face. God knew exactly what He was doing when He created you: He gave you a fierce, strong, hard-working, joyful spirit. Every single day someone stops me to tell me what a beautiful child you are, and the thing is, while your beauty certainly takes my breath away, it is the depth and beauty of your soul that really shines through. I am SO proud to be your momma, Bels. So, so proud. 

I'm not sure we could love you more if we tried, your daddy, brothers, sister, and me. Your siblings still argue about who gets to sit next to you at dinner, and they light up when they see you after school. They are proud to show you off to their friends, and they get so excited to see you accomplish something new. They are some of your greatest teachers and protectors, and they will be behind you, and beside you, for the rest of your life. So will your daddy and I. You will never be alone again, sweet girl.

Since your last birthday you have started school, and I don't know that I've ever seen a child love school SO much! You wake up every morning and look at me with a twinkle in your eyes, as you ask me, "Dool?" (which is how you pronounce /school/ these days ;) ). You love walking in like a big girl, just as proud as can be with your book bag on. You are crushing goals and working so hard, and we are so excited to see what your future holds. Your teachers and therapists, both at school and at home, love you so much and are so proud of you, Bella. You bring happiness wherever you go. <3

Bella, I met with your teachers and therapists a couple weeks ago to update your Individualized Education Plan for next year. They spoke about how much you've accomplished this year and areas they still want to focus on for next year. As the meeting was coming to an end, your head teacher took her glasses, looked at me, and started to cry. She said that when she thinks about you and the "what if," specifically "What if Bella was still in an orphanage in China?", it breaks her heart. She just can't imagine you still being there, alone and in need. As she wiped away her tears, she looked at me and said, "You guys saved her life." But honey, the truth is? You saved ours. 

You have brought more happiness, faith, love, and strength to our family than I thought possible. I just don't know what we ever did without you, Bels. Thank you for saving our lives. 

Here's to you on your fourth birthday, Bella Elizabeth. You are so very loved. 

With all my heart, 

Momma