Cheers to the Weekend: Long Weekend Edition

Helloooo, Friday! I feel so spoiled to have a 3-day weekend after JUST getting back from Christmas break, but I'll take it! 

Before we kick off the weekend fun, a few things we're seeing CHEERS to this week/end:

Turning six. As I've mentioned a time or two hundred, our Raleigh turned six one week ago! Although I already blogged about how we rang in the big 0-6, partay style, I never mentioned what we did leading up to her Uptown celebration. She awoke to traditional door decorations and then came downstairs to find all her birthday surprises. This girl wanted a Hatchimal sooooo bad, and was soooooo excited to find one waiting for her first thing in the morning, among other birthday gifts and surprises. :) 

Per tradition, her daddy whisked her away for a birthday breakfast, her choice (Dunkin Donuts). A few hours later, I met her at school for lunch, with a Chick-Fil-A kids meal (for her) and cookies/brownies (for her classmates) in tow. And I thought this was so sweet: any time a parent comes to eat with a student, the student is allowed to invite a friend to join him/her for lunch in the special seating area reserved for parent visits. This time? Rals asked her teacher to join us. <3 The three of us enjoyed a lovely meal together and then Raleigh stayed to finish out the school day. 

Once she arrived home, we all gathered 'round for her to blow out her birthday candles on her momma-made cake. <3 After we devoured enjoyed a few slices, it was time for Raleigh and I to hit the road for her party. And that was that! :) The next day, Bammy and Digby came up and stayed and played all afternoon to help celebrate our birthday girl, leaving the next morning. We were having so much fun, not one of us snapped a single pic - ha! It was fun for all and a great way to close out the birthday shenanigans. Happy 6th, Rals! We love you!

Downtime. As we have eased into 2018 and the second half of the school year, we have made it a point to spend plenty of downtime together. <3 And honestly, these are always my favorite parts of every day. I am a get-down-on-my-hands-and-knees-and-play kind of momma. I enjoy getting on my kiddos' level and really playing with them, and every time I think back on my favorite moments of the week, it undoubtedly comes back to these simple, special times. <3

Routine. I loooooved our relaxed, jammie-day-heavy Christmas break, but I also love a good routine. And I have felt very rejuvenated and energized the last week. I honestly think the stress and busy-ness of the holidays takes such an emotional and physical toll that it's been nice to be so structured and routinized again. With that has come the resumption of our weekly therapies as well as several medical appointments on the horizon: One was yesterday and we have two more in the next two weeks. That being said, we graciously ask for your prayers: prayers for the answers we are seeking and prayers for a smooth transition into any interventions and/or fullow-ups we may need as a result. Thanks y'all. <3

And now, the weekend is here! We've got some fun things planned and some unplanned things, and I can't wait for it all. TGIF, friends! Be back soon!

A Panoramic View

Sometimes when you're in the thick of it, it can feel dark and lonely, overwhelming and hard. Unbearably hard. 

There are too many people in my life right now who are dealing with unfathomable, unspeakable, cruel, heart-wrenching despair. 

It can shake one's faith, one's trust in others, one's trust in God. 

There is no end in sight and sometimes, it requires just taking things one breath at a time. Not one minute at a time- one breath. And just holding on like hell. 

Oh, how I wish I could take the pain and hardship away from my people. I wish I could fast-forward time, erasing the bad and saving the good. 

But I can't. And I can't even fully relate, because they are the only ones living their stories and trying to remember to breathe. I don't know how it feels to be them right now. Excruciating, I imagine. However, I can't truly know because I'm not them.

But. 

If I may, I'd like to share a recent story from my life, and also a message my pastor delivered over the weekend, in an attempt to offer some sort of something: 

___________________

I have felt pretty disheartened at times, particularly over the last few weeks, when it comes to our beautiful Bella. I have felt so angry and sad and frustrated and confused by the hand she has been dealt: about the medical uncertainties, about the hours upon hours of needed intervention, about the many appointments and procedures she has had and will have, about all that remains unknown. But also? About the fact that so much of this is because she had to live her first 2+ years of life as an orphan among (hundreds of) orphans. About the fact that we have virtually no thorough medical record. About the fact that there is so much we don't know and will never know about her first days, weeks, months, years. It brings me to my knees. It breaks my heart. 

Sometimes, it feels like I am running as hard as I can to help my daughter and not getting anywhere. 

But then, days like this past Monday happen. 

I was feeling defeated - wanting to see these leaps and bounds in Bella's development and instead, having to settle for baby steps (sometimes, when I feel defeated, I forget that leaps and bounds AND baby steps are both forward progress, but I digress). Anyway. It was cold and had started to rain. I dropped Raleigh off at dance and quickly raced to the grocery store to pick up a few items we needed, moving fast in order to get back in time for dance pick-up. Bella was fussy, I was frustrated. It had been a hard day, a hard couple of weeks, really, and I just wanted to hurry up and get out of there already. 

I stood in the check-out line, chatting with the very kind cashier. To be honest, I was faking my kindness in return because I was feeling pretty low and grouchy. She continued to ring up our items as I proceeded to pay. And then, it struck me: Bella. She wasn't distraught, crying, panicked, and reaching for me, begging me to help her escape the cart and get away from this stranger, who was now standing closer to her than her momma. I glanced up to see her calmly watching the cashier place our bagged groceries in our cart. Then, she looked over at me, her momma, and smiled. Like it was no big deal. 

Except. It WAS a big deal. Because my daughter, who, for months, has been terrified of grocery checkouts - when she is momentarily closer to the casher than me - knew that she was safe and that everything was okay. This was progress. 

Sometimes its hard to see that things are moving forward when you're in the thick of it. We can't see the full story. We can't know how things will work out. 

___________________

On Sunday, our pastor began a very powerful series on coping with disappointment and despair. He eloquently shared an analogy about a parasailing adventure he and his wife had taken one time. While in the air, they looked down and saw a shark. But they also saw a great big ocean, filled with space and time and endless possibilities. Here's the thing: when we are in the thick of things, of unspeakable, heartbreaking anguish, of challenges and hurt no one should ever have to endure, we can become lost in this ocean of despair. We can only see the shark that's directly in front of us. What we aren't privy to is what God sees: He has the overhead view. Yes, he sees the shark (and no, He isn't always the one who placed it there), but he also sees the rest of the ocean, the rest of the story. He knows why the shark is there, and He knows how the story will unfold. 

While we can't have God's all-knowing, all-seeing, panoramic view, we can try to adopt a parasailing view: when the darkness is closing in, look for the light. Look beyond the shark. Know that God sees you, He sees the shark, and He sees the rest of the story. Hold on. Just take your next breath. Stay afloat. And know that He (and we, your people) have got you. 

Throwing Down, Uptown: Raleigh Turns Six!

Several months ago, I gave Raleigh six or seven options for birthday party ideas. There was one that was different than the others, in that it would mean not having an actual "party" (as in, the kind where we invite her friends and have some sort of fun theme at a standard party-type place). Without hesitation, she chose the non-party option: a night in a hotel with her momma! I'm not going to lie: I was SO excited! Not only because I would be able to get some good, quality time with my oldest girl, but also because it would mean very little party-planning on my behalf-ha! Always appreciated after a busy holiday season. :)

Nonetheless, I wanted to make sure it was a special, special celebration for my Raleigh Jane. We tried to make her feel special from the second her 6-year-old eyelids popped open last Friday (more on that later this week) and had so much fun celebrating our girl first as a family before she and I headed out for her birthday adventure that afternoon.

At 3:30 pm sharp, we loaded our packed bags in the car and drove Uptown (aka Charlotte) to let the partying begin! I had booked a room at the Renaissance Hotel, which is located directly next to SouthPark Mall (more on the reason for that in a sec). BUT. I didn't book just any room. No sirree bobtail. I booked the "American Girl Room." What is that, you may ask? Well, it's a doll-lovin' girl's version of pinkalicious heaven. :)

As soon as we walked in the hotel, Rals was given a personalized letter welcoming her and her doll, "Riley" :) , to the hotel and given a special sticker. When we opened the door to our room, she squealed: there was so much pink and girly fun! Pink blankets, pillows,  and towels; a pink trashcan, clock, robe, and beanbag. AND there was a doll-sized bed, blanket, slippers, and robe for "Riley" to keep. Rals couldn't believe it!!! We spent a few minutes jumping on the beds (and jumping off a chair and into the beanbag) before exploring the hotel.

The sweet bellman had given Rals a penny to use to make a wish in the hotel fountain. She told me her wish, and it melted this momma's heart. <3 She and I then threw our jackets on, grabbed "Riley," and walked straight outside and across the street to the mall, where we would be meeting my sister and my niece for dinner at the American Girl Cafe (hence why we wanted to stay directly next to this particular mall). 

The girls were so cute at dinner! We then let them roam the American Girl Store for a bit. Raleigh originally planned to have "Riley's" hair done - we even had an appointment in the doll salon! - but then decided, rather than wait, she'd rather go back to the hotel to swim. And what the birthday girl wants, the birthday girl gets!

So, we went back to our room, changed into our suits, and walked down to the indoor pool. We let the girls swim for a bit (I hopped in for a few minutes but the water was not quite warm enough for me to stay in long!) and then went back up to the room, where the girls were met with a fun surprise: strawberry milk and (pink) cookies! So, we got on our jammies, sang "Happy Birthday," and let the girls dig in! 

We then let them open the treat bags I had brought for them, which contained popcorn, juice boxes, and treats to enjoy while watching a movie in bed as well as "How to Draw a Princess" books that Raleigh's Nana and Pop had sent (two of!) for the girls to enjoy. :) We snuggled in, enjoyed Trolls, and finally called it a night shortly after 10:00 pm. Such a great day!

We awoke the next morning and let the girls draw some princesses before getting dressed and going down for breakfast. We concluded our stay with a little dance party in our room. :) Finally (sadly!), it was time to go. We packed up our things and hit the road, driving the 20 minutes back home. 

I just cannot say enough about the adorable accommodations. We had the best time! When I asked Raleigh what her favorite part was, she said, "Every part!!!" I would have to agree. It was definitely a birthday we won't soon forget. Happy 6th Birthday, sweet Raleigh. What a fun, fun time we had celebrating you!

Six.

There is a little girl 

with long blonde curls;

she is all things girly,

loves to dance and twirl.

There is a little girl 

who is sugar and spice,

can be sneaky and sly

(but is mostly nice).

There is a little girl

with the bluest eyes

who is friendly and sweet

but, also, quite shy.

There is a little girl

with the biggest heart

who's adored her new sis

from the very start.

There is a little girl -
I call her mine -
best pals forever
'til the end of time. 



Raleigh Jane, Happy, Happy 6th, my sweet girl. The day I heard, "It's a girl!" was the day so many of my dreams came true. Thank you for being exactly who you are - kind and nurturing, sugar and spiced, beautiful and loving, smart and brave. Here's to YOU, Rals. You are so very loved.

With All My Heart, 

Momma

Cheers to the Week, Hello 2018 Edition

Happy New Year, friends! And welcome, 2018! We hope you'll bring more love, light, faith, and positivity to the world. A few things we are saying CHEERS to as we welcome in this new year: 

Downtime. Things have been pretty crazy since Bella joined our family just over five months ago; so, I'm not going to lie: it's been LOVELY to have a break from school and therapies and extracurriculars and all that jazz. While we've enjoyed a date night here and there with friends, and a few Momma dates for my littles, some playdates and sleepovers, we've also had plenty of downtime as a family. We've had fun with new toys, had plenty of pajama days, and have mostly stayed indoors to escape the frigid temperatures currently enveloping us!

New Year's fun. I have been feeling particularly sad about Christmas coming to a close - mostly the laidback, schedule-free family days we have been able to enjoy. BUT it helped to look forward to some New Year's Eve (and Day) fun! We started off by doing our annual countdown to 12:00 (noon) with the kiddos. Think headwear, noisemakers, sparkling juice, ya know - the whole shebang. We then spent the evening with friends, enjoying a delicious sushi dinner (for the grownups) and pizza (for the kids), followed by some fun games! It was such a fun way to close out 2017. 

On New Year's Day, after enjoying our usual meal of ham, collars, and black-eyed peas, we rested up for a bit and then headed to our friends' house for some good football watching! We were so, so bummed our Tigers ended up losing to stinkin' ol' Bama - I practically had my bags packed to head to ATL for the Natty next weekend - but we are so proud of our Tigers, who were supposed to have had a year of "re-building" after losing some key players last season and instead ended up ranked #1 and playing in the College Football Playoffs for the third time in as many years. Now, we'll wait to see what the 2018 brings our Tigers!

Awareness of the preciousness of life. My sweet nephew, Smith, was born over the weekend. <3 Love him so.

And with that, we will begin to bid our Christmas break adieu. The kiddos return to school tomorrow, and a certain, special little someone is turning the big 0-6 on Friday. Adventure awaits! Be back soon...