We mommas, we have ALL been there.
We have all been the momma with the crying child in Target (True story: I nursed an infant Banks in the bathroom of Target when he wouldn't stop screaming with every ounce of strength he had).
We have all been the momma with the tantrumming child in the middle of a playdate (Fact: I do not hesitate to put Banks in timeout when he throws a fit in the middle of a playdate, no matter where we are, no matter how many people are around. Consistency, right?).
We have all been the momma who has snapped too quickly when her child just.won't.listen. (Raising my hand, right here, right now).
We have all been the momma who has used bribes (read: lollipops, cookies, Skittles, M&M's) to get through a trip to the grocery store without a major meltdown (Ummm...every time).
We have all been the momma who has belted out children's songs during car trips in attempts to make her child, please-for-the-love-of-all-things-good-in-the-world, stop sobbing (offering every snack imaginable is also a feasible alternative).
Yes, we have ALL been there.
I think parenting is made harder when other parents act like parenting isn't hard. It IS hard. That's part of the reason I think it's so rewarding. Because, while there are many, many easy, beautiful moments, the hard ones are when we
are able attempt to shine as mommas.
I have many, many un-shiny moments.
Maintaining my patience is an often daily battle for me, especially when little 3-year-old ears just don't seem to be functioning properly and little 1-year-old bodies are being thrown on the floor in a fit when things don't go the way she'd like.
Keeping my cool can be a lofty goal when 3-year-old whining resonates between the walls of my home like a skipping cd, and 1-year-old bodies fight nose- and ear-cleaning like a cat thrown in a warm bath.
I cannot choose how my child will choose to act. I can choose how I react to those actions and do my best to always model appropriate behavior (as originally and beautifully stated by Amy of Total Tippins Takeover. Seriously. Such a brilliant remark.).
And each day, I will choose to try and react more cooly, more calmly, more collectively.
Some Many days, I will fail. But I will get up and warrior on. Try to grow. Try to change. But. Also recognize that 3-year-olds are going to tantrum sometimes. And 1-year-olds are going to throw fits.
And to you, momma in Target with the screaming baby, momma at the playdate with the fit-throwing pre-schooler, I will give you a knowing glance that holds the promise that I've been there before. As have all the other mommas. I'll be there again. As will all the other mommas.
Just so you know, all you mommas out there, I'm with you. I feel your pain on the tough days. I cry with you on the especially frustrating days. I experience the guilt of coulda-shoulda-woulda post-patience-losing days. I get it. I've been there.
We have ALL been there. And will continue to be there. Just know you're not alone. And neither am I.