Thursday, April 24, 2014

My First Letter To Our Last Baby

Dear Baby Lu,

If you only knew how loved you are already, before you have even taken your first breath. You are an answered prayer, one I have dreamt of my entire life when I envisioned, and then prayed for, what my life would look like one day. Even during times of uncertainty and hardship, you were always there, a glimmer in my eye, a hope in my heart.

I remember so vividly when I was pregnant with your big brother, Banks. I was excited and scared and uncertain and naive and in love with the idea of being a Momma. I was so worried about making mistakes. And then he was born. And then my life found meaning.

I remember, clearly, my pregnancy with your big sister, Raleigh, too. I felt a sense of responsibility, being a role model to a little girl. And worried, so worried, that adding another baby to our family would be hard on Banks. Those fears quickly melted away the second he laid eyes on his sister. What an incredible gift to have been able to bring them into each others' lives. Seeing them together, my life found joy. 

And now, precious little one, my pregnancy with you, my last little miracle, is coming to an end. I am no longer fearful that I may make mistakes as a Momma--of course I will! But. I will learn from them and grow from them to be a better Momma for you. 

I am no longer scared of what it means to add another baby to our family. Your relationships with your siblings will be some of the most influential and special and loving and supportive of your life--trust me. I am lucky enough to have the best big brother and greatest little sisters on the planet. You see, I cannot imagine breathing without them. You and Banks and Raleigh are already so blessed to have one another, and I cannot begin to tell you how excited they are to meet you. We all are, in fact, because we simply adore you, the last piece of our family we have been waiting for and praying for and hoping for. 

And how very lucky we all are to have your Daddy in our lives--the best Daddy in the whole wide world. He loves you so much already and has big dreams for you, Baby Lu. And trust me when I tell you he will stop at nothing to help you make your own dreams come true. He is simply the best. 

So, my sweet baby, the time has come. We are ready for you. We are ready to see you, to kiss you, to hold you, to know you, to love you, with everything we've got. And yes, there will be chaos, a whole lot of chaos, as we adjust and search to find our footing as a family of five. But there will also be love. A whole lot of love. 

Rest up, Baby Lu. Tomorrow's your big day. And I simply can't wait. 

With All My Heart,


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